Thursday, 11 November 2010

REVIEW - The Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure [Kindle Edition] by Phillip R Greaves

I saw a link to a protest group on Facebook against this book.  Having seen all kinds of intemperate rage against its very existence, and imagining that I'm some kind of fair minded bloke, I decided to download a copy and read it before judging it for myself.

The author is a paedophile (British spelling, I'm British).  Hold your horses and put down your stones: we abhor his view, but as intelligent and rational people we defend to the death his right to express it.  Don't we?  Well, let's see.

He begins by claiming no intention to promote or excuse sexual congress between adults and minors, then goes on precisely to do just that.  I will spare readers much of the detail, but some is necessary to make the point.

He asserts that paedophiles "care for and befriend their young lovers" and "always" put them first.  This denies basic human nature and requires us to believe that paedophiles never succumb to the enormous temptation to go further than their partners wish.  As other adults sometimes cross this line, in the heat of passion, why expect us to believe that paedophiles don't.

He asserts that paedophiles "never practice intercourse with juveniles under thirteen".  From the testimony of adults I know, and have known, this is plainly and verifiably false.

He claims that a paedophile "becomes child-like with respect to its juvenile partner" and "enters into an equality of personhood with its young friend".  But ignores the fact that the juvenile still sees a fully mature and powerful adult, not an equal child.

He then claims that "these realities place pedosexuals firmly among humanity's most considerate and solicitous lovers".

At this point, I could read no more.

Immature children have no equality with fully mature, powerful adults whom children are disposed to look to for authority, judgement, protection and nurture.  Such children are not lovers, but victims - victims of adults who abuse their position of authority and trust.  Most of us begin our sexual lives by fumbling and experimenting with those who are as inept and inexperienced as we are.  We make silly mistakes and so do our partners.  We say no, we say maybe, we push the boundaries, we pull back, we go forward.  With an equal partner, at an age when we can deal with the emotional storm which rages, we feel our way to sexual maturity.

With a powerful adult, with a mature sexual appetite, deceiving themselves perhaps that the child is equally empowered, we lose the ability to say "no", we are taken advantage of and become victimised.  As we doubt ourselves, our choices, our limits of self, fearful of raging conflicted feelings, and maybe fearful of future sexual encounters, our lives are poorer to the temporary satisfaction of the paedophile.

The author misses the point entirely.  He fails to comprehend the harm of under-age sex, particularly with adults.  He fails to appreciate why such activity is illegal in most advanced societies.  He therefore promotes his tastes as though they were harmless.  Not only is this book distasteful to those who understand the fragility of young minds, it is arguably illegal in a number of jurisdictions where it may be judged to incite, or conspire to promote, criminal behaviour.

I'm joining the group!  And I'm quite happy to justify precisely why I'm joining the group, on an informed basis.

If you'd like to view or join the group, you can find it at


  1. Billy
    Thank you for a reasoned statement. While the subject is distasteful, uncritical hysteria doesn't help matters.

    I think there is a problem, in that adult people who abuse children are to _some_ extent blind to their actions; nevertheless, I believe that we all have a fundamental sense of what is right and what is not right, and whenever we are confused about this, we should err on the side of doing what is right (including - but not limited to - not hurting others).

    Naturally, the whole matter is complex (which is why we need always to be informed and make use of our critical faculties), but this complexity is no justification for selfish actions.

  2. Alistair,

    Thanks for the comment. The basis for the material I read is that the author sees nothing wrong with his actions, and is indeed blind to the harm they cause. This is why we need legal sanctions in place.


  3. Hi.
    I wanted to read this book since it was released a few years ago to see by my self if the book need the censorship it recived, but i cant find anywhere a copy of the book to download, can you help me with this pleas? where can i find this book to download?

  4. Hi Severick, The only place I found it was Amazon and they have since suspended it. When I had read enough, which was before the end of the first chapter as I recall, I deleted all trace of the material from my computer. So sorry, I have no idea where you could obtain a copy, and frankly if I did, my conscience would prohibit me from assisting you. Billy.